Monday, September 30, 2013

I hate to break it to you, sir

But your Zimmer is one foxy lady. She is NOT based on a Lincoln Town Car, no matter how much you insist.  This is a mid 1980s Zimmer Golden Spirit. Look at the passenger Compartment, especially the doors and windshield.
Zimmer Golden Spirit
That is not from a Town Car.  It is not even from a 1982 Continental.  It is straight off a Fox body. My best guess would be a Mustang.

Speaking of things that knock

Heisenberg Chrysler 300

What ever happened to the Heisenberg-mobile?  We last saw it...

Sunday, September 29, 2013

First $29,800 takes it

and it also buys you a divorce, because AYFKM?  $30K for a Camaro?
1983 "ITD" Stiletto Chevrolet Camaro fake Ferrari
"Realistically priced"
1983 "ITD" Stiletto Chevrolet Camaro fake Ferrari
It makes concentric Prelude gauges look brilliant

1983 "ITD" Stiletto Chevrolet Camaro fake Ferrari
Build quality/ panel fits seem consistent with 3G Camaros

Saturday, September 28, 2013

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

All the beautiful people

to see and all the beautiful places to be, and yet here we are, valet parking at the headquarters of the hair club for men Trump.
Lamborghini Gallardo

Lamborghini Gallardo

Lamborghini Gallardo

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Kid Rock was in Glendale

Chevrolet Camaro
Chevrolet Camaro
Chevrolet Camaro

Sticker Porn:2013 Rolls-Royce Phantom Drophead Coupé

$547,185 (from $469,900).  This is "bespoke," but if i had to guess, it was a spec car.  The red dragon is bespoke.  My goofing on the configurator is bespoke. This is sansabelt.  This is a "queer eye for the straight guy," tasteful to a fault spec car, if I had to guess.
2013 Rolls-Royce Phantom Drophead Coupé invoice
$9000 for "Carrara" White; $9,225 for bespoke "marine"white


Sticker Porn: Lamborghini Aventador

Aventador Roadster
lamborghini, Aventador

Unlik the Rolls, I get most of this. My biggest disapointment, and one i just cannot see past, is that Lambo charges $7,550 for "Transparent engine." This is a lie. The glorious V12 is completely opaque. I know this from looking through a $10 piece of plexiglass at -

oh wait.

 I suppose the $4,200 "Lamborghini sound" is a radio and not a charge to hear it rev.
lamborghini, Aventador

We'll be all right if we can just get back on the expressway.

1974, Plymouth, Fury, bluesmobile
Tonight only, the fabulous Blues Brothers. Rhythm and Blues review. The Palace Hotel Ballroom. Route 16. Lake Wazzapamani. The fabulous Blues Brothers show band and review. 

Hijos de la anarquía


Monday, September 16, 2013

In 1979

This guy would be rocking the Tony Manero white suit and gold chains, in his new Buick Riviera.
Ferrari 355 Rush St chicago

In 2013, it's done with a quasi-hipster older('94-99) Ferrari 355, trolling Rush St.
Ferrari 355 Rush St chicago

the goal is the same: hookers and blow. And a sammich.

Exported From Detroit

I'm the one who knocks - Heisenberg the suspension, while playing "Curbhunter."
This is the 2013 Chrysler 200.  It was supposed to be a "Hyundai Accent or similar."  No one in Kalamazoo wanted to rent out a convertible, so it was "what's cheapest?"  Then, I got an upgrade, because this is Kalamazoo, and it's all they had.

A thousand miles over the week, left some distinct impressions...

Walter White/Heisenberg Were Spirited Off

1973 Cadillac Coupe deVille1973 Cadillac Coupe deVille

to Tucson in last night's episode of Breaking Bad.  Or at least they should have been.  Tucson is the place to go to disappear.

Just ask Uncle Heisen-Bob.

Friday, September 13, 2013

I Wouldn't Understand

It's a Jeep thing.  You wouldn't understand.

And I guess I should, but I just don't.  I joined the cult of Jeep in 2002.  I bought a "pre-lifted" '02 Jeep Liberty.  Jeep quickly realized that all that extra clearance and height made them more tippy, so they
cut the springs in half made a mid year adjustment to reduce the ride height. The extra height I had (vs. the ex's 2wd 2003 Liberty) was key.  Hers was a grocery getter; I had dreams of something beyond crawling down dirt roads, afraid of a scratch.  Something closer to a Jeep Wrangler. Something like this:

Jeep Liberty Coke Ovens run
 3 foot tall speed bump on the way to Coke Ovens

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Civic Pride

Honda 600
You've come a long way, baby

The Honda Civic turned 40 this year. AYFKM? 40?  Porsche 911, Ford Mustang (Ed.: close enough - we'll connect it in a minute) and/or Lamborghini minus 10? This is amazing for one model.

Entire car companies/makes have come and gone (Saturn, Geo, Merkur, DeLorean, Vector (Ed.: close enough - we'll connect it in a minute)) while the Honda Civic keeps plugging away.  It's both a testament to longevity, a cultural touchstone of the times in which it was designed and a tribute to the pathogenic resistance model of car manufacturing.  The thing won't die, regardless of what Honda does to it.  At various times Honda ignored, starved, mutilated it. Almost as often, Honda acted like it really loved the car and wanted it to be the best small car out there.  It is almost like the Star Trek movies:  every other one sucks, but the franchise refuses to die (see Vector), no matter how bad the off years.

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Trolling for dates, Chicago style

it's simple. Buy a new (to you) Bentley Continental GTC (look, no plate!).

Unload it a block off Rush street.

Cruise for babes, valet park...
Hookers and blow ensues (one hopes)
Bentley Continental GTC
Whoa, Chicago parking nazis do  NOT fuck around

Sons of Anarchy

More real than you think. At least in some ways.


Monday, September 9, 2013

Life Imitates...Life? BMW 3 Series E90/E93

So the other day, I dropped in on 8 Barrel and the missus.

8 has a "new" car, a BMW 3 Series E90.  It is a 335i, which means somewhere between 306 and 335 bhp.  Wifey has an E93 335i - this:


Both are hella fast.  The 4 door is my choice for most purposes, except a drive to the beach.  But this is not a road test.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

"We're from the Factory Team"

"Well," he said, "as your attorney I advise you to buy a motorcycle. How else can you cover a thing like this righteously?"
"No way," I said. "Where can we get hold of a Vincent Black Shadow?"
  "Whats that?" "A fantastic bike," I said. "The new model is something like two thousand cubic inches, developing two hundred brake-horsepower at four thousand revolutions per minute on a magnesium frame with two styrofoam seats and a total curb weight of exactly two hundred pounds."
 "That sounds about right for this gig," he said. "It is," I assured him. "The fucker's not much for turning, but it's pure hell on the straightaway. It'll outrun the F-111 until takeoff."
"Takeoff?" he said. "Can we handle that much torque?"
"Absolutely," I said. "I'll call New York for some cash."

Vincent Black Shadow

Zoot Suit

i just love this bug eyed dandymobile.
1930 Cord

1930 Cord

Jed Clampett's Dream Car

1931 Pierce Arrow Model 41 limousine, ready to load up and head for the hills of Beverly.
1931 Pierce Arrow Model 41 limousine
1931 Pierce Arrow Model 41 limousine

1931 Pierce Arrow Model 41 limousine

Drive Like a Pirate Day

Avast ye buckos! Thar she blows!
1931 Franklin Pirate
1931 Franklin Pirate

More Riviera

Buick RivieraJust $2995!  "Free Warranty"!

Wouldn't you really

rather have a Buick? Just come to southwestern Michigan. More Reattas and Rivieras per capita than anywhere on Earth. Or so it seems...
Buick Riviera
Look begind the sweet Continental

Clean, Low Miles

Just $3,995 buys you a Ford Mustang II.  Only 37,000 miles.  However, it is still a Pinto under its fansy blue clothes.  And it's the worst car ever. Keep that in mind when whipping out that checkbook