Sunday, June 26, 2011

Grandpa... bought a rubber

[caption id="attachment_14351" align="alignnone" width="600"]1973 Mercury Colony Park The original was blue, like balls[/caption]

Nothing says "ooh baby, I am ready to play" like a 1973 Mercury Colony Park.  To be historically accurate, it needs a dash compass (to find your way home when you have no idea where you woke up), and a blanket in the wayback to buffer the metal cargo area and the vinyl seats when your getting busy with the swarms of hood rats that are inexorably drawn to this bastion of testosterone fueled manliness.

To be truthfully accurate, the blanket was actually for staying alive if the car broke down in the winter - not completely unheard of, once the grand "gasahol" experiment of 1978 fucked up its whole fuel system.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Welcome to Tempe

Tempe cops
is that a choreboy in your purse or are you just happy to see us?

Bazooka Joe

Jeep tarted up for army duty
Starting today, I am commuting with a Howitzer.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Embrace your destiny

[caption id="attachment_14325" align="alignnone" width="640"]1971 Dodge Charger ready for the late night shift[/caption]

30 years ago, this Dodge Charger meant you peaked as a shift manager at the BK Lounge. Today, in this shape, it meas that trust fund isn't just going to your ASU tuition.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Best Torino Ever

1971 Mercury Montego MX wagon, owned forever by some now deaf dude from Payson

It shows up just seconds after this...

1971 Mercury Montego MX wagon
Family Truckster

1971 Mercury Montego MX wagon
Which means best Ford Galaxie ever

Worst "Ass Engine Nazi Slot Car" Ever


[caption id="" align="alignnone" width="240"] Beers + Bug + Mastercard + J.C. Whitney = this hot mess[/caption]

Oooo, the J.C. Whitney "Rolls Royce" fiberglass grille.  Woo   Hoo!  And only $5 grand!

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Hotel California?

And I was thinking to myself, ’this could be heaven or this could be hell’

The Eagles, Hotel California

[caption id="attachment_20060" align="alignnone" width="600"]Citroen (c) Peter Lippmann[/caption]

Well let's just see:
Heaven is Where: The Police are British, The Chefs are Italian, The Mechanics are German, The Lovers are French and It's all organized by the Swiss.

Hell is Where: The Police are German, The Chefs are British, The Mechanics are French, The Lovers are Swiss and It's all organized by the Italians.

I think the answer is pretty clear, even without the Citroen DS.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Fredo Wang, Pimp Daddy

[caption id="attachment_4302" align="alignnone" width="640"]Lincoln Continental Mark V file photo[/caption]

  • Mismatched Sears tires

  • "distressed" vinyl roof

  • "Tiger-striped" velour

  • beersoaked carpet.

Nothing says, "bitch, hand me that money" better.  Except saying "bitch, hand me that money."